Year 5: Tuesday 16th June: Home Learning: English

Good Morning Year 5
You have 5 tasks today. We expect task 4 to be written on the blog.

Write your story on the blog.

Task 1

Your first task is to answer the questions in whole sentences. Analyse what you can see. Use your inference skills to work out what is happening. ANSWER THE QUESTIONS IN YOUR HOMEWORK BOOK.

Do not answer these questions on the blog. Do this in your homework book.

Task 2

1) This is a challenge to write some sentences of your own, so you need to analyse the picture carefully.
2) Make a list of all the objects you can see.
3) Write 2 adjectives for each object so you can create an expanded noun phrase.
4) Write at least 5 good sentences with at least 1 expanded noun phrase in them.
5) Keep these sentences to one side and use them in your story.
CHALLENGE: If you have any verbs, can you add an adverb?

Task 3

There are 3 sentences that are not very well. You are charged to use your awesome writing skills to rewrite these 3 sentences and improve them. Try adding expanded noun phrases, adverbs, fronted adverbials or even a relative clause. (You can find an example of all the features at the bottom of the blog as per usual)

Task 4

This is your story writing task. You can use the sentence next to the picture to help start your work. This should be written in your comment. Here are the expectations.

Bronze: Full sentences, capital letters, full stops and adjectives

Silver: Adverbs, expanded noun phrases and fronted adverbials.

Gold: effective figurative language, multi clause sentences with commas, uplevelled adjectives, parenthesis.

Platinum: subordinate conjunctions and relative clauses.

WRITE YOUR STORY IN THE BLOG COMMENTS!

Task 5

examples-of-good-writing-2

113 thoughts on “Year 5: Tuesday 16th June: Home Learning: English

    • Hi, you say this every week. Please have a go or ask your sister to support, she will help. You can do quite a lot. Please don’t forget a BH value is resilience.

  1. A beautiful,bright day and then a fight happens. The weather changed from beautifully,bright warm🌤to a gloomy,scary night with lightning. 🌩But who cares as they wanted the fight to go on,which was not safe as lightning could of really hurt them. ⛈

    As the weather changed around they were all ready to fight and see who would win. They were stubborn and wanted to not risk there life with a battle but then with lightning. They started to fight and in the thunder and lightning and the jedi saw that they could have more power so they started to take control. ⚔

    More laser and bombs were thrown and the more people were injured they knew they could not let them of lightly and had to do something quick.

    They thought they became kings of the battle and thought they won👑.
    But did they?

  2. Task 4
    … Quickly before they were beaten . Looking like a world war , they gathered all their fighting equipment . It was time to FIGHT!!! Anxiously , the groups charged at each other . Most of the storm troopers were getting killed because of the huge flying aircrafts above the aqua , cloudy sky .

    The towering , ancient buildings standing like trees were as tall as sky scrapers . Luckily , one of the storm troopers had a grenade . He told everyone part of his team to stand back and BOOM!!! The storm troopers were still alive but the others were laying on the ground . As fast they could , the storm troopers ran rapidly never coming back .
    The rest of the tasks are done in my homework book

  3. One day there was a war going on in space this wasnt anything like world war 1 or 2 this was the aliens vs humans the aliens started with shooting the humans with there spaceship but nothing happend it was just slim then the humas shoot one of then with his laser gun that went throw them then the human captain thort how would slim get destrowed then he thort of water so then he ordered to get him some water he threw water at all of them they did it they killed all the aliens.

  4. The army of storm troopers stood with their powerful guns in case of an enemy. The blue cloudy sky was filled with woderdul aircraft almost covering the sky.
    Slowly the Jedi landed on the rocky runway and carefully landed.

  5. The sky was blue and the fluffy clouds made it white. The spaceships blasted through the sky. Suddenly, the door opens and millions of storm troopers come out. They were prepared for the battle they kept on looking more serious so the Jedi can give up and lose the fight. But the Jedi was clever and confident so they believed in them self and they also knew what to do.

  6. The invasion had begun. Faced with row upon of white-clad storm troopers, the Jedi knew they had to act quickly…

    Crash! The plane crashed into the base. The armoured, dangerous soldiers fled the destroyed base. The Jedi fled the base and ran to battle. They fought the storm troopers. They failed. They needed to evacuate so they stole a ship and fled.

    “What are we going to do said a member of the Jedi.”
    “We have to keep fighting said the leader, Yoda.”
    They found a abandoned base with a lot of health kits and weapons. They took everything and returned to the fight. With some weapons they defeated the storm troopers. Then the leader of the enemies showed up. Darth Vader and his son Luke was on the Jedi team.

    Him and his son fought. The Jedi was behind Darth Vader and struck his back. Then Luke hit him in the face and they won.

  7. The sky was bright and blue and the day was sunny too. Quick buzzing space ships were flying through the white fluffy clouds. Some of them landed smoothly onto the long white runway. The doors opened, and some angry armed troops started marching out. The ground started shaking, and the large spacious buildings did too.

  8. Story starter:
    The invasion had begun . Faced with row upon row of white-clad storm troopers, the Jedi knew they had to act quickly . Otherwise the storm troopers would attack there buildings and living area . “ We need to run back to our office and find out what we can use to win victory !” Suggested Jedi .So they all ran back to the office trying to find something that they can use.Meanwhile, the storm troopers were stomping towards them almost getting surrounded . At the office they were searching all of the draws and cupboards to defeat the troopers . “I got it ,a potion that defeats the troopers all we have to do is spray it onto the floor in the direction there coming . Then they go boom! “Explained Jedi .
    So that’s what they used ,different glass bottles to spray it ,all in cars racing towards the road going as fast as they can they sprayed the potion everywhere. The storm troopers slipped and they all fell apart and didn’t go boom! So Jedi’s plan was wrong ,but in the other hand they were free from the storm troopers and lived happily ever after .
    THE END

  9. It was a humid day but unexpectedly, the invasion had come. A lot of stormtroopers lined up outside Jedi base making a submission. They were starting to emerge around the whole area. The stormtroopers who were very evil and corrupt, they marched towards the base without stopping. Some of them were demolishing parts of the city to make them surrender. The stormtroopers found it very arduous to make the Jedi troopers to Capitulate But they carried on and they were trying soo hard but in the end it was a loss!

    • Can you check your use of the word ‘submission’ please Hishaam. I’m not sure if it’s the best word to use there. Also, think about ways to up-level your openers. You have used very simple sentence openers such as ‘The’, ‘They,’ and ‘Some’ and I think you can use more powerful examples than those.

  10. Task 2
    The things I can see are: stormtroopers, droids, spaceships and a runway.
    The glistening, robotic droids glided mechanically across the grimy runway.
    The towering, intimidating, stormtroopers aimed fire at the surrounding spaceships.

    Task 3
    The unknown jedi landed destructivly on the delapadated runway.
    Scanning the area surrounding me I quickly realised there were an abundance of aircrafts all around us and a giant collection of stormtroopers staring menacingly.

    Task 4
    As we crash landed into the city of Vohecury we were petrified of what lay ahead of us. We felt paralysed and our legs felt like jelly we couldn’t figure out what to do next, our crew thought we should look for civilisation and stay there until they could find the beacon to fix our ship and head home.
    We found some very peculiar houses and we asked to stay for the night but no one would let us in. While on our journey looking for the beacon we found a hideout we searched and searched until out of nowhere two droids aimed fire at us luckily we had brought our guns with us and we got into a war.

    • I like this Anis, well done! I do think though that you have missed opportunities to describe the setting in more detail, thinking about the 5 senses and how to bring the setting alive for the reader. Remember to always think about the reader when you are writing- will they be enjoying it? Can it be better for them?

  11. The invasion had begun. Faced with row upon row of white clad storm troopers, the Jedi had to act fast as they were running out of time. They had run out of ideas and had nothing else to do but try to land on the runway as it was their only option left. Suddenly, an idea 💡struck into the jedi’s mind the only way to lad on the runway was to make them think they are coming on it so the Jedi took a Decoy fighter jet and landed it on the runway and them lined up behind it. So that they shoot it 🔫 then it will explode and then when they a reloading that is when they attack.

  12. It was approaching night fall on Coruscant . When the civilians heard a low humming ; which they ignored until it got louder and louder in the blink of and eye a star destroyer leaped out of hyper space then another one and then another one until and entire fleet of them rested on Coruscant’s atmosphere. The civilians ran. The fleet of Coruscant took off securing the battle up in the air. but the ground assault came hundreds of storm troopers came of off the ships flooding into the great planet. Purge troopers the worst of them all came. There were not a lot of Jedi left so General Leia Organa ( Luke’s sister) and her Rebels joined the fight. The remaining Jedi assured the Padawan to run but they knew they could not win the fight without them. Meanwhile, up in the air Poe Dameron lead the force of X wings, Y wings and A wings. Down on the ground, purge troopers advanced on the Jedi and their Padawan taking them down. When the battle looked bad the Second Sister Inquisitor came to the battle, Brandishing her double – blade spinning light saber . The battle lasted hours but both forces were damaged enough and none of them could risk to lose so once the sun set once again the Galactic Empire fled the fight. At the end Coruscant had to rebuild the big city.

      • Great story, Aboubakar. Well done, great descriptive writing! Lovely vocabulary in places. Some sentences are very long, could these be shortened? Or perhaps add parenthesis to your multi clause sentences, to make your writing easier for the reader? Please email all completed work in.

    • Excellent effort as always Aboubakar, well done!
      I am really impressed with the amount of effort you have been putting into your work and the detail in your writing. Your skills have really improved, you should be proud. Keep up the great work!

  13. The invasion had begun. Faced row upon row of white – clad storm troopers, the Jedi knew they had to act quickly. It was now or never. The Jedi attacked, hunting in pairs. Suddenly, there was a big BANG! as a ship came crashing down. Luke went in search of the evil Lord. Darth Vader. He had found it. He had found the Sith’s lair. Just like that, Luke found him. He reached for his emerald , green lightsaber and quickly hit the dark Lord. However, he had quick reflexes and dodged the attack. It was Darth Vader’s turn but Luke also dodged. Darth Vader had a lapse of concentration. It was Luke’s chance. Darth Vader got a lightsaber to the chest. He was defeated. Luke was victorius. Without warning, Darth Vader lifted off his helmet. After all these years, the truth had been revealed…

    • Well written, Muhammed. Action packed start to the story. I like it! I wonder what happens next…..
      Email your completed work over please.

  14. The invasion had begun. Faced with row upon row of white 🏳️ clad storm ⛈ troopers, the Jedi knew he had to act quickly… As more and more storm troopers shot 💥at his aircraft, the Jedi became more and more powerful. Using lasers and ships, the battle between the two forces became more ferocious. Suddenly, a large CRASH 💥came from the side of his ship! He felt the ship tumble and fall to the ground. The Jedi escaped out of the ship, which had now caught fire 🔥. Storm ⛈ troopers crowded around him, and he suddenly realised; he had to fight them by himself. ⚔️
    By Chloe ✨💜

  15. It was a hot day when all of a sudden,the invasion had come.Millions of storm troopers lined up outside jedi base making surrender.They were an closer just as every step counted.The storm troopers which were cruel and horrible never stopped walking towards there base. Some of them were breaking all of the buildings just to make them surrender.The storm troopers found very hard to make the jedi troopers to surrenders…

    • Good relative clause included Adam well done. Just double check, I think the device may have auto corrected some of your sentences meaning they don’t make sense! Think about expanded noun phrases and frowned adverbials too :)

    • Braydon, you need to add more to these sentences, you could use expanded noun phrases. You need to write the story on the blog for task 4, as asked by Mrs Sharma earlier today.

    • The invasion had begun. Faced with row upon row of white clad storm troopers, the Jedi knew they had to act quickly to save their lives the troopers ran and scared the whole city and some of the ufos away the troopers killed everyone that go in their way and gave up after a while and ran away.

  16. The invasion had begun. Faced with row upon row of white clad storm troopers, the Jedi knew they had to act quickly to save their lives. Quietly, the worried Jedi whispered “ lets use our back up plan” when all of a sudden the white clouds turned into grey and the stormy clouds gathered together. After, bright blue light there was a Bang! The aircraft started flying around firing and more storm troopers came out. Jedi used the back up plan and sprayed his gas while the Jedi had mask on, the storm troopers fainted and the aircraft crashed and pieces scatted everywhere.

  17. The invasion had begun. Faced upon row of white clad storm troopers, the jedi knew they had to act quickly…
    They were hurrying threw the cloudy air it was forced to go slowly it was hard to get threw no one new were they were going.

    • Hi Saskia, great effort. Can you add more detail to your story? You could use adverbs, expanded noun phrases and fronted adverbials. Be careful with your spelling of ‘threw’ should be ‘through’. Up- level you sentences and email your completed work over.

  18. The terrible invasion had now begun.Faced with row upon row of pure white clad evil storm troopers, The smart Jedi knew they had to act quickly and cautiously. The storm troopers wore dsrk cloaks to prevent from showing their faces and wore a mask to cover their faces. The cloaks were made out of beautiful silk which dangled and flew about when they wondered around. The storm troopers were sly little foxes and came out of the aircraft. They quickly put on their hoods. No one dared to seek what was beneath their hoods otherwise… They came out and tried to find the Jedi and exclaimed to their self ‘MUHAHAHAHA WHERE IS THE JEDI.’ His voice was very low as low as a old man was croaky like a frog.one of the troopers left the army. He was demonically possessed and followed the army back to find the Jedi
    From *~✨RehanH✨~*

  19. The invasion had begun faced with rows of white clad stormtroopers the Jedi knew had to act quickly.Luke pulled out his glowing sky blue lightsaber ready to fight. The air was filled with aircrafts that we’re battling the Sith. Carefully Luke crept into the Sith’s lair to face Darth Vader. Luke swung his lightsaber at the evil lord but as quick as a flash he blocked his attack with his own scarlet red lightsaber. Luke attacked him with all he got but Darth Vader blocked his attacks like it was nothing.Suddenly Luke stabbed him in the stomach. Slowly he lifted his helmet and the truth was revealed…

    • You have made a good effort here Aidan and I like your use of adjectives, well done!
      You are missing some punctuation in your writing, making it slightly difficult to read. Please make sure you remember to include punctuation where it is needed, so that your writing makes more sense.

  20. It was a beautiful warm, day until, it turned dark and all a sudden there were people in aircrafts swarming around us.
    In the blink of an eye, they landed on the marked run way, they came out dressed in black they looked like the storm troopers but in a different Colour.There silky cloak flew of their backs.
    The Jedis came to help them to hide in secret passage from the evil king.They hide them were the king doesn’t know.

    • Really good effort Cara, well done! You have included some nice adjectives. You have used commas in places where I think it would be better to use a full stop and start a new sentence. Please can you go back over this and improve, thank you.

  21. The Jedi leader was struggling with a plan to attack the Sith . He sent Anakin and Obi-Wan-Kenobi to fight the stormtroopers who had no reason to interrupt, the normal , kind life of the civilians. Kylo Ren led a group of stormtroopers into the Jedi base trying to take over the planet . As the stormtroopers made their way to the Jedi’s base. Obi-Wan-Kenobi took out half the stormtroopers , Anakin took out the other half , but then they had to face Kylo Ren .

    When the 3 men fought each other ,their lightsabers glowed , Kylo Ren took Anakin down and looked to finish him off but Obi – Wan -Kenobi intervened and blocked the lightsaber with his lightsaber.
    The 2 fought on as Anakin recovered from the shot to his leg, soon Anakin recovered to join his mentor, in the battle to defeat their rival .
    Anakin then took revenge on Kylo Ren and took him down and finished him off ,later on at the Sith base , they treated Kylo ,and healed him.

  22. I think it’s different because you have no food there and also no drink.
    there are 566 people that have been to space.in a rocket the first people were buzz aldrin and Neil Armstrong.
    I don’t think so because when you take off your suit to eat that’s very bad in space. it’s not possible
    in 100 years there will be new inventions and in 1000 years even more.

    ufos
    destroyed buildings
    fire
    towers
    creepy, suspicious ufos
    destroyed, crumbling buildings
    hot, burning fire
    tall, demolished towers

    the creepy suspicious ufos hovered over the city
    the buildings were crumbling down onto the floor
    there was a fire burning everything in sight
    the buildings were tall and demolished
    everyone was scared
    the brave Jedi landed on the great runway
    there were many strong storm troopers
    there were many big aircrafts
    as they were about to charge they realize that the Jedi had a sword and they had there bare hands so they ran and stole lightsabers so they could beat the Jedi.and then they charged and they felt much more confident about them selfs so they both charged and the stormtroopers won.

    • Super effort Adela. Remember to start your sentences with a capital letter. Your sentences are too long. Perhaps you can shorten them and up- level you story. Use full sentences, capital letters, full stops and adjectives to help the reader. I would also like to see more descriptive writing, you could use personification and expanded noun phrases. I look forward to seeing all your work.

    • You have made a really good effort with this Adela, I am impressed.
      Big well done to you!
      However, you have yet again forgot to use capital letters. It is important to remember you use them in your writing. You have listed a lot of good things, but it would be nice to see you structure them as sentences for your story to build up your writing. Make sure you use all the writing features to strengthen your story. Keep up the good work and please email your work to us once completed.

  23. The warrior princess rode in her army swiftly on dragons. They clashed on to to the battlefield . The eyes of the prince who rode a mega mute lioness clashed on the the eye of the abnormal princess with her dark daring eyes on his . They exchanged fearsome smiles as the war had become … prince Xhilac has his fair hair swishing in the night sky …

  24. I have completed task 1,2 and 3 in my homework book and will email it in later.

    Story starter:
    The invasion had begun . Faced with row upon row of white-clad storm troopers, the Jedi knew they had to act quickly . Otherwise the storm troopers would attack there buildings and living area . “ We need to run back to our office and find out what we can use to win victory !” Suggested Jedi .So they all ran back to the office trying to find something that they can use.Meanwhile, the storm troopers were stomping towards them almost getting surrounded . At the office they were searching all of the draws and cupboards to defeat the troopers . “I got it ,a potion that defeats the troopers all we have to do is spray it onto the floor in the direction there coming . Then they go boom! “Explained Jedi .
    So that’s what they used ,different glass bottles to spray it ,all in cars racing towards the road going as fast as they can they sprayed the potion everywhere. The storm troopers slipped and they all fell apart and didn’t go boom! So Jedi’s plan was wrong ,but in the other hand they were free from the storm troopers and lived happily ever after .
    THE END

  25. The fight had begun. The stormtroopers were ready to fight. Thousands of stormtroopers were lined up in front of the Jedi base. The stormtroopers were walking closer to the Jedi base trying to make the Jedis surrender but what they didn’t realise was that the Jedis were behind them. After defeating them the Jedis took the stormtroopers inside and made copies of the stormtroopers so much they can go undercover…

    • Good job Harun, a bit repetitive with the “storm troopers” could you describe them another way using expanded noun phrases and figurative language to build imagery for your reader?

      • Basicallly on question 6 task 1 it says is this possible but I Said i don’t think people won’t move to space permanently? That’s what I’m confused about???????

        • That is fine Rehaan. You have answered the question by saying people won’t move to Space permanently. Answer all the questions in your homework book. Complete all 5 tasks, task 4 needs to be posted on the blog.

  26. The lush green trees were blown by the wind
    The building rotted away like biscuits
    The wind blew the trees smoothly
    The Forrest were Erie

    • Hi Abdi,
      Good effort. However, I am not sure ‘rotted’ is the best word to use for the building. I think the word ‘crumbled’ would be better. Or even if you could up-level the word crumbled, that would be great.
      Challenge:
      Up-level the word ‘crumbled’. Then, use that word in your sentence to replace ‘rotted’.

    • A great start Hayyan. Please add more to your story, use fronted adverbials, expanded noun phrases and more descriptive writing. Email your work over to us when completed.

  27. The Jedi’s Were prepared for the big battle. So They came out… BANG! The building had shedded into pieces. They Quickly jumped into. There aircrafts suddenly SHOTS FIRED! 🔥 At the dark millions of stormtroopers had fell to the ground and died. The Jedi landed on the runway and took cover from them. Suddenly A Meteor Had Fell Into there Area….
    Bang! Suddenly the Jedi’s Woke up……

  28. Sentence challenge
    Jedi
    Sky
    Clouds
    Road
    House
    Space ships.

    Sick sentences
    The Jedi landed on the runway:
    The confident Jedi Shooted down the runway And softly landed.

    Story starter:
    The invasion had begun
    Faced with row upon row of white – clad storm racers. The Jedi new they had to act quickly. The Jedi ran to there base like their lives depended on it. They quickly found their bomb blower On a car and they flew up to The storm racers and the Jedi tried to blow a ship up he pressed the button and a bomb flew out he drove away quickly but the clad racer’s fate had already been decided the bomb hit his car and blew him up.

    • Grea Kiyan. Check your spelling for ‘gray’ this should be ‘grey’. Where is your task 4? This needs to be shared on the blog. Remember, use full sentences, capital letters, full stops and adjectives. I look forward to seeing all the tasks completed.

  29. Task 3:
    The Jedi Landed On The Runway and took cover of the dark side.
    There Were lots of stormtroopers and the Jedi’s had to figure out a plan.
    There were lots of aircrafts going head to head.

  30. I can see aliens broken buildings ufos
    In the sky were crazy, loud ufo’s.
    One the broken building were a crowd of heroic,crazy aliens
    There were broken buildings that were crazily, set on fire.

  31. The invasion had begun. Thousands of stormtroopers lined up in front of the Jedi base. The Jedi had to act fast. The stormtroopers started marching up to the base ordering the Jedi to surrender. The stormtroopers didn’t see that behind them were hundreds of Jedi troopers . Then out of now two unknown figures holding Green and blue lightsabers disarmed the stormtroopers. They took the stormtroopers inside and let them go keeping the weapons. Next day the Jedi made two exact copies of stormtrooper uniforms to go undercover…

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