Children return to school Mon 8th April

6B 5/5/20- English Descriptive writing

Today, you will be using the language that you have learnt and apply it to describing this scene.

Use the below pictures from Avengers: Endgame as an inspiration and I would like you to write a setting description for this scene.

Avengers: Endgame' Star Was Shocked To See Their Cameo In The Film
Avengers: Endgame' Stunt Coordinator on Shattering the Glass ...

Use the following descriptive examples to help you:

  1. A scar of bright light hung in the bat-black sky.
  2. A gash of radiant light broke through the cauldron-black sky.
  3. A fracture of birthstone-bright light peeped through the pagan-black sky.
  4. A rupture of moonstone-yellow light appeared in the carnal-black sky.
  5. A lesion of lodestar-bright light illuminated the benighted sky.

Think about using the following figurative language or maybe adapting it to make your own.

  1. We were battering and beating against our enemy under a sunless sky.
  2. We were clobbering and clubbing against their shield wall under a moonless sky.
  3. We were pounding and pummelling their defences under a beamless sky.
  4. We were carving and cleaving towards the centre of their army under a rayless sky.
  5. We were mangling and gashing their serried ranks under a starless sky

You do not need to copy the above phrases as it is. You can change adapt the phrases so you personalise your writing!

I am looking for: Accurate grammar use, appropriate figurative language, a range of adverbs, powerful adjectives, a range of clauses etc.

Here is an example of a fight scene to help you get started:

The sky was carrion-black. Poppy-red blood drizzled from our wounds. The trolls were clunking axes and crashing war hammers against our shields. Arrows were zipping and hissing through the air. Some of our men were sobbing and snivelling with fear. Swords were ringing against each other. A legion of trolls attacked the centre of our lines. The septic smell of death hung over the battlefield. It was a battle of head-clasping horror. The acrid taste of blood rose up in our mouths.

25 responses to “6B 5/5/20- English Descriptive writing”

  1. Zuzanna B.

    Dark heavy clouds covered the once brilliant blue sky like a blanket of coal eliminating any source of light.While down below millions of monsters and soldiers were preparing themselves for a battle of a lifetime,to face their destiny .Clouds of dust rose from the ground creating a misty haze in front of them.The blustery whipped their faces every few seconds as the soldiers ran down the mushy field.There was a sea of monsters with wicked grins,that were about to charge at them with sharp,sailent spears.Inside, we were all terrified.Weapons clashed.Arrows zoomed.Axes hit.The stench of death hung over the battlefield. Tiresly battling and beating our enemy under no shining light. This was a bloodthirsty battle with no end in sight.Then, suddenly a scar of bright,vivid light illuminated this once benighted sky.Was this a sign of hope?Hearts pounded. Bodies shook with fear yet we clutched our weapons with our bleak,brisk hands ready to fight once more.Stumbling over bodies deluged in blood.The emit glow of bright yellow still shone ,giving us strength.

    1. Mrs Ahmed

      Beautiful as always, you have clearly understood the task and described a powerful, dark setting.

    2. Mrs Jones

      Wow beautifully written.

  2. Abdulwahab E.

    As we walk towards our enemy thoughts raced through my head “what if we lose or die?” “what if we are too late?”The dim sky above us had no moon or sun just lifelessness.We stood waiting for the battle to begin.Waiting… Waiting… Waiting. Very soon I grew impatient however the enemy arrived.

    We began to walk towards them then a jog and finally a sprint then I started to think about the battle ahead “What if we lose or more importantly die,” “ what if we never make it back home and we’re stuck in this desolate wasteland” soon enough we met the enemy and all of a sudden bang…

    1. Mrs Ahmed

      Oh how I miss reading your writing. Very good piece but you need to edit to include missing punctuation. Hint: Rhetorical questions end in?

  3. Sofia S.

    As I walk down the rocky floor I glare intensely at my opponents. We stand fiercely, waiting for the battle to begin. I look to my left, I see my strong, brave, teammates, ready to do battle. The smell of smoke and burning flesh is in the air. It feels like we are experiencing an eclipse, the light suddenly gone from the sky, like hope has gone.

    1. Mrs Ahmed

      Really good Sofia, your next step is to embed elements of description within all sentences. Even when glaring intensely you could describe the surroundings.

    2. Mrs Jones

      Well done Sofia really good description.

  4. Hadisa D.

    Looking from side to side I could see people either side of me snivelling with fear. Three, two, one CHARGE! We charged at the enemy nothing else on our minds. The sky was clouded with a fine grey mist.Scarlet blood dripped from our swords causing a pool of blood to form on the ground. Our swords collided causing a metallic crash to sound. Dead bodies, drenched in blood, littered the ground. A flame flared up on the ground ready for some unlucky person to fall to their death. It was a battle of head-clasping horror.

    1. Mrs Ahmed

      Good writing, don’t lose the intensity by describing the warriors as ‘some unlucky person’. Always read your work and ensure it follows your theme.

  5. Kinzah Q.

    Through the thick, black smoke that filled the tense atmosphere, they stood . Among the debris and rubble , there was a still a tiny gash of light piercing through the jet black sky. Enough to help us see our deadly foes. Our wounds oozing with gore.Our swords painted in fresh blood and ichor as we sliced through and struck our enemies . Our metal Armour jingled as we sprinted across the bloody battlefield as if we were in a marothon, except this depended on our very own lives. The deafening clashes of swords and shields . The ferocious roar in unison sounded more like a boom that could’ve extracted the soul from your body.The Battle, Had Begun…

    1. Mrs Ahmed

      ‘had begun’ always check your punctuation. Good eerie and dark writing.

  6. Azan S.

    Scene1) The black smog covered the blue sky, everything was demolished fires were everywhere, buildings were collapsed to the floor and containers were destroyed.
    Scene2)When we charged to our enemies The ground was rumbling like a an earthquake, The battlefield went quiet to a sound like a volcano was erupting.
    Scene3)The battlefield went quiet, and everyone payed their respects, the fires still burned but they were about go out the moon shone against the sky and the fog cleared.
    Scene4)As portals opened to different dimensions you could here the fiery crust of the portal the ground started rumbling as more of us gathered together.

    1. Mrs Ahmed

      This isn’t what you have been asked to do.

      The second line of the blog says ‘I would like you to write a setting description for this scene’

      SETTING DESCRIPTION: Paragraph about the setting, using the language from yesterdays English blog.

  7. Sofia S.

    As I walk down the rocky floor I glare intensely at my opponents.
    We stand fiercely, waiting for the battle to begin.
    I look to my left, I see my strong, brave, teammates, ready to do battle.
    The smell of smoke and burning flesh is in the air.
    It feels like we are experiencing an eclipse, the light suddenly gone from the sky, like hope has gone.

    1. Mrs Ahmed

      Thanks Sofia, could you please edit these sentences to form a cohesive paragraph.

  8. Gerry K.

    Scene 4)Furiously the heroes charged at their enemies in the pitch,black and cloudy weather.
    Scene 5)The heroes walk between the catastrophic disaster with building crushed into pieces.

    1. Mr Inman

      Some great vocabulary used here Gerry. You need a comma after the adverb if you use it as a sentence opener.

    2. Mr Inman

      Look at the example Gerry. You need to write a setting description.

  9. Haya S.

    scene 1 = there were so many of them that I didn’t know what to do.
    scene 2 = i got an idea ATTAK

    1. Mrs Ahmed

      This isn’t what you have been asked to do.

      The second line of the blog says ‘I would like you to write a setting description for this scene’

      SETTING DESCRIPTION: Paragraph about the setting, using the language from yesterdays English blog.

  10. Jessica M.

    Scene 2:
    There fighting against there enemies.
    Scene 3:
    The people are walking and in the background you can see the buildings are collapsed.
    Scene 4:
    The people are looking at there enemies and probably saying to them selfs that we are going to defeat them under the moon and it’s dark too.
    Scene 5:
    The people are surrounding the buildings that are collapsed everywhere.

    1. Mrs Ahmed

      This isn’t what you have been asked to do.

      The second line of the blog says ‘I would like you to write a setting description for this scene’

      SETTING DESCRIPTION: Paragraph about the setting, using the language from yesterdays English blog.

  11. Aliko M.

    Scene 4) Under the bright moon sky we fought for our lives against our enemies.
    Scene5) Surrounding us you could see buildings collapsed and collapsing all over the place.

    1. Mrs Ahmed

      This isn’t what you have been asked to do.

      The second line of the blog says ‘I would like you to write a setting description for this scene’

      SETTING DESCRIPTION: Paragraph about the setting, using the language from yesterdays English blog.

Leave a Reply